50 shades of T


I can’t believe i just finished reading 50 Shades of Grey. When I started reading it, I told myself that it would be only for a couple of chapters, but I guess I was intrigued to read the whole chapters. The crazy thing about reading the book was having to feel emotionally exposed and vulnerable. I thought about Teo A LOT and it was really painful. No, there were no BDSM whatsoever involved in our relationship, but T puzzled me as Christian did to Ana. Maybe it was just my crazy mind, I could get really attached to some characters when I read or watch something. But I can’t help thinking that T possessed some of Christian’s qualities. Here are some of the quotes that reminded me so much of T.

How does he switched so quickly from one mood to the next? He’s so mercurial… it’s hard to keep up.

I knew there was something weird about him. He has commitment issues.

I have fallen for someone who’s so emotionally shut down, I will only get hurt -deep down i know this- someone who by his own admission is completely fucked up.

He’s the most complicated person I know, and I cannot understand his ever-changing moods.

I know he’s moody, difficult, funny, cold, warm… jeez the man is a walking mass of contradiction.

He’s not capable of love -of giving or receiving love.

You should steer clear of me.

I could relate to Ana. I think she has a mission to safe Christian from himself, from the darkness, but it was so difficult that she got trapped inside the darkness instead. Some people probably won’t understand why Ana keeps on coming back to him. I ask myself the same question every time I get so vulnerable and think of running back to T. Ugh, stupid heart! I want to feel numb. I expose myself too much tonight, I think all this disclosure will heal me though. One day! In the meantime, I’ll be my own superhero.

ps. I kept listening to this song while reading the book. So much love for Ellie Goulding<3

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